Are you doing pretty well in most areas of your life, but still struggle with your romantic relationship? This time of year can be especially hard if you're in an unhappy relationship. But there's hope.
You can't change other people. (Don't you often wish you could?) How many times do people say, “Things would be so much better if only he (or she) would change”? It's usually futile and frustrating to try to change anyone else, but you can create powerful changes in your life when it begins inside of you.
Here are six spiritual principles to follow to create a happier relationship and change the lives of both you and your partner. Best of all, while you may find many opportunities to apply these relationship-changing tips with other people in everyday life -- including co-workers, friends and other relatives -- these tips can be applied to any kind of relationship to build a bond of trust and affinity.
So here they are. Six powerful change agents to build more successful relationships:
1- Express gratitude.
- It's a key tenet of attracting everything you want in life, and it works for a successful relationship, too. Whether you decide to share your thoughts during dinner, at night before you go to bed, or even on little notes posted on your bathroom for your partner to see before they leave for work, telling your partner you are grateful for them creates more of the behavior you're grateful for. Be specific.
“I am grateful that yesterday you...”
Also remember to verbalize or write down what you appreciate about yourself: positive traits, specific actions or decisions you made. You simply can't have a strong relationship without feeling good about yourself, too. The spirit of gratitude is a powerful agent for positive change in your life.
2. Show and tell your partner how much they are appreciated. -
It's one thing to let your partner know, every day, the different ways they light up your life. But we live in a world where people want to see evidence of everything, and this is true in successful relationships, too. From bringing home fresh flowers (which add a healthy dose of life chi to your home or apartment, as well!), to knowing exactly how your partner takes their coffee, look for small but meaningful gestures you can use to show your partner you love them.
3. Keep your word. -
Strong relationships are built on trust. But it's not just the big things (remaining faithful, being open and honest about finances, etc.) that require you to keep your word. When you say you're going to be available for a special date, make sure you're there. (If you believe there's a chance you won't make it because of other priorities, don't say you will be there.) Even if it's something as small as promising to bring home milk after work, stay true to your word. This builds trust in very subtle ways, and trust is the foundation for a successful relationship.
4. Be a giver, not a taker. -
The more we give, the more we receive. It's a law of the Universe, taught by the great spiritual masters and applied every day in Feng Shui principles, and it works in relationships, too. Think of your partner first. Be sure to give more than you get (without thoughts of getting anything in return.) Your relationship dynamic will change. You'll be happier. And so will your partner. Simply giving more is an amazing path to positive change.
5. Be a good listener. -
Follow the Buddhist principle of listening with your heart. Don't judge. Don't give advice. Just listen with an open heart and your partner will feel the love flowing out of you.
6. Show compassion to everyone -- but especially to your partner. -
Again, the more compassion, love and selflessness we exhibit, the more will come back to us. Align your home or apartment to match these goals by
Helpful People section
of your home as a reminder to be helpful, kind and compassionate to others. Love is amazing -- the more we give away, the more we have to give. Practice compassion with friends, family, co-workers and strangers. But always give your partner the best of your kindness and compassion.
People love being around people who make them feel as if they matter, make them feel as if they are the only person in the world. When you begin acting in ways that encourage those feelings in your partner, you are building a successful relationship and a lifetime of happiness.