How to Feng Shui Your Life Perspective
Feng Shui is about how you align your outer environment with your inner world, thoughts and desires. But you can also shift your inner thoughts so they are in better alignment with the person you want to be. How do you do it?
One process I like to use is called “re-framing.” This technique can change your perspective on a situation from negative to positive, completely changing your emotions about a person, a job, or even a living environment. It's best to illustrate re-framing with an example. Let's look at two different ways to view a very common situation: a spouse arriving home late from the office.
Example 1, Negative Framing
It's getting late and your spouse is still not home from work. You're beginning to worry. Maybe he's cheating on you. Or out drinking at the bar. Maybe he just got caught at work doing a project his boss gave him at the last minute -- again. That's it. He never knows how to stand up for himself or say “No.” And he never thinks about your feelings. Dinner on the table is getting cold and you're growing angry. When he walks through the door, you greet him with your hands on your hips and a glowering stare. He says “Hello,” and it escalates into a fight.
Example 2, Positive Re-framing
Your spouse is late coming home from work and you're beginning to worry. A myriad of possibilities float through your mind. Cheating? Last-minute work? Traffic? Hmm... you know the weather often causes train delays, and his “station car” has been acting up lately, too. Maybe he's stuck somewhere. You begin to feel sympathetic toward him, and quickly put his dinner in the stove to keep it warm for when he returns home, probably exhausted. He walks through the door and you greet him with a big hug and a smile.
What was different in each of these situations? We don't know what caused the delay, but the wife's reaction created a specific energy and action when her husband finally returned from work. In the second example, she “re-framed” the situation in a way that allowed her to give her husband sympathy, rather than getting angry. Nothing else changed, except how her actions created a better night for them both.
You can re-frame your thoughts in any situation by choosing to look at a person's motivations differently, or by choosing to think of a best-case scenario instead of the worst thing imaginable.
Choose Your Thoughts
In every moment, we have the potential to choose our thoughts with intention. If you have two thoughts -- one that makes you feel good and one that makes you feel bad -- doesn't it make sense to choose the thought that makes you feel good and increases the odds of a positive outcome?
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