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How To Overcome The "I Don't Deserve It" Excuse

 
Divine Creation

How is it possible for a Divine creation to be unworthy? You are and always have been a piece of God. And you know by now that all beings come from nonbeing; the Bible itself remind you that it's Spirit that gives life. So where on earth did you learn to use this excuse?

As a developing child, you were weaned on ideas that your worthiness is based on ego-dominated formulations making you what you do, what you have, and what others think of you. Your worth became intertwined with these ego constructs: If I do well, I'm worthy; if I don't, I'm unworthy. If I accumulate more valuable stuff and make more money, I'm worthy; if I don't, I'm unworthy. If I gain the approval of others, I'm worthy; if I'm unpopular, I'm unworthy.

Like most of us, you were immersed in a culture that taught and reinforced these ideas, which are the work of the false self. Consequently, as an adult, when you see others who are more successful than you are, have more toys than you do, and enjoy reputations far greater than yours, your first impulse is to make a disconnect between your status in life and your worthiness as a human being.

Years of solid training in ego development have caused you to retreat into an I don't deserve it / I'm not worthy mind-set. Since these excuses come from the false self, they'll stay with you until you leave the planet, unless you're willing to tell yourself: "Okay, I understand where this kind of egotistic reasoning originated - and I can see that I still use it - but I'm practicing the Excuses Begone! way of life from now on."

I urge you to decide to start thinking something along the lines of this: Everyone in my life did what they knew how to do, and I chose to buy into it at that time. But today I'm going to stop this insidious kind of absurd thinking and remind myself that I'm a Divine being, an individualized expression of God. Therefore, I will no longer entertain thoughts of my being unworthy - I've lived with them long enough, and they've never served my highest good.

- Excuses Begone!: How to Change Lifelong, Self-Defeating Thinking Habits by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

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Comments

Thanks Ken.Your comments are always  
uplifting.It's strange but your quotes sometimes seem to be addressing my inner condition at that 
particular point.It's like God's voice speaking through you.GOD BLESS!
Posted @ Monday, May 17, 2010 9:21 PM by Pavneet
Pavneet, So glad to hear that these daily words are fulfilling you and addressing your needs. I truly appreciate you taking the time to leave a comment. Thank you!
Posted @ Monday, May 17, 2010 9:41 PM by Ken Lauher
Hi Ken, yes, I do know what you are saying is true...from my own inner experiences and insights...and I learned a piece of wisdom about this when I was at an ashram a few years ago...it is..that unworthiness and negativity..the emotions and thoughts and sensations that are all wrapped up in this unworthiness we all feel...is ego, and not the Divine within..it is the ego that tells us and convinces us that we are basically unworthy, undeserving, etc. And it does help me to shift perspectives or my thinking on that when I have feelings of unworthiness...to not buy into it and what the ego is saying because it is the ego and not the divine witin that is operating here...but ..why and what do you mean by "thinking"...by shifting your "thinking", Ken? Does it include emotions, physical sensataions, thoughts,visual images, etc? I ask because these feelings run very deep within me, and I am guessing, in all of us... 
 
and just shifting my thinking or "perspective" is not enough for me, I have found...it is a place to start and does help, and your offering here does help me to incline my mind in that direction as a starting point..and not to disount doing that and its value...but my experience is that that is not enough to make a signiicnant and lasting change...it helps, even insights or aha experiences or realizations along these lines help and shift the unworthiness in me, but the mix that goes with that..the emotions, the phsycial sensations...etc..are so deep, and I intuit, really at the core of us all...no, not the true core or divinity of us all, but very deeply entrenched in the way of the ego....and it is a very difficult journey and task taking very deep insight, and unraveling and sorting this all out...that just shifting perspective and thinking won't really do it..or make a dent very much..to the point of reaching wholeness in the long run, even a lower level of enlightenment or wholeness....so when you say the above, to me it sounds kind of unrealistic or naive maybe or too simple....and does not address the extreme difficulty, that at least i have found and am finding, in releasing this ego pattern...or deep ego way...which saddens me. Craig Hamilton from the Integral Institute, and the Enlightenment Next websites and work...the Ken Wilber et al crew...he said one time that really deep inner enlightenment work...is really rare and difficult..that there are certain deep surivival mechanisms we all have and that deep down we all really do not want to change and resist it so very strongly, even more than can be imagined....and it takes much inner work and committment to even approach these deep survival patterns in us all....and even most enlightened teachers don't do that really...and that is what this unworthiness you speak of here is to me..this is one of those deep survival patterns that are basic to the ego that is built into us, so to speak, sort of part of all us very deeeply...and yes, it is good to discuss it and shift our thinking in it...and to recognize that we are afraid of success and our greatness and beauty and divine love and the divine within....and so we choose, as we have been taught by society, our parents to go the way of the ego....and of course we all want to evolve and honor our divinity...and I am finding that I benefit from loving the unworthiness in me...embracing that as well as the joyful and more positive emotions...or states... 
 
and I guess I feel a little sad and lonely for the lack of recognition and support from others who haven't shared their 
 
deep inner realizations and deep inner work with us...and me...like along these lines about unworthiness discussed here...finding like minded people is a hard one for me...but maybe i need to shift my "thinking" in this regard somehow...ha! And now I am reaching the point of..saying...well, it's not the negative or positive emotions or mind states that are important...but what we are authentically feeling and thinking at any moment that is the major thing...whether it's unworthiness, joy, hatred, love...it's all okay and whatever one is feeling at the time, what the truth of that is, the authenticity is the major thing...and honoring that and just dropping the whole thing about ...focusing on positive or negative states or emotions....and just honoring what is, whatever is arising, whatever feeling is arising, no matter whether it's unwholesome or wholesome....like in nonviolent communication...the idea of connecting with oneself and others through whatever is alive in us in the moment...and honoring and connecting through pain as well as happy feelings...kind of the essence of what i am saying here in a different context...the jury is out on that right now...that is my current exploration....unclear and under investigation, so to speak...I guess i am hearing some judgement in what you said here, Ken....a judgmental flavor sort of...a judgmental approach or something like that...no offense, at all meant..I am just expressing what my truth is and what my experience is here...and this is an open forum and place for me to do that, I have gathered..and I am very grateful for that...I tend to get into trouble by speaking my truth and what my true experience is...with most groups and people..so please, no ill will or harm intended in any way...I do apprecaite the comments here and do understand that this is a limited short discussion here..and I am grateful for the stimulation and opportunity to express myself...and for the open minded discussion and offering... 
 
Take care, thanks again, and I wish everyone love and peace. 
 
Sharon May someone benefit from what i said here! May the sky not fall down because I have expressed my inner truth...which rocks the boat of most people I encounter these days and their skies seem to fall down...then it falls down on me, too, by their reactions! Ha! So I hope that doesn't happen to anyone who reads this...peace in the midst of thunderstorms and tornadoes of the mind is welcomed by me these days! Ha! ha! Maybe we can do a lovein in a middle of a tornado or hurricane and teach each other to stand still and firm in the midst of it all..takes me back to the 60's...gee, I am really dating myself here! Ha! Take care, all. Sharon
Posted @ Tuesday, May 18, 2010 10:00 PM by Sharon
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