3 Ways Of Choosing To Be A Leader

The Tao offers three other ways of choosing to be a leader. One option is to make a difference in the lives of others, resolving conflicts through love. By being an instrument of love and making an effort to praise others, this leader stays in harmony with the Tao.

Those who are praised are inclined to become self-loving and act in a cooperative rather than competitive fashion. The drawback is that using the approval and affection of a leader for motivation means turning control of one's life over to that leader. But if you see that the choice is between love or fear, the Tao always sees love as superior.

The ineffectiveness of fear as a leadership style is obvious: If I can get you to do as I desire by using that weapon, then you'll only behave in these ways as long as I have the power to threaten you. When I leave, my influence over you departs as well. Studies have measured the effectiveness of teachers who were considered strict disciplinarians. Students in this setting were well behaved when the feared individual was in the room, yet when he or she departed, the classroom turned chaotic.

The opposite was true of instructors who viewed education as an opportunity to praise and encourage students: Their presence or absence from the room had almost no noticeable impact. This is a great thing to keep in mind if you're a mother or father. That is, do you want your children to behave only when you're around, or do you want them to have self-discipline to conduct themselves wisely whether you're there or not? I've always believed that parents are not for learning upon, but rather exist to make leaning unnecessary.

The least effective means for managing others is to use tactics that will encourage them to despise you, for the moment they leave your sight, they'll defy all that you say and stand for. Dictators almost always find this out the hard way, when the people they've abused rise up to threaten them in the same intolerable fashion in which they've been treated. Children who despise a parent similarly tend to emulate the hateful tactics to which they were subjected, or they detach themselves completely from the dictatorial adult and spend years attempting to heal the scars from the terrible treatment.

The enlightened leader trusts those whom he or she is in a position to govern. This view results in trust, as he or she who has faith in the people will be trusted by them in turn. Consequently, they'll be able to say, "We did it ourselves." So raise your children to be self-sufficient, to make their own decisions as soon as they're able, and to feel pride in the decisions they do make. See yourself as an enlightened leader, and show the world a new type of leadership. Children who grow up with such a view will be the next generation of great leaders that Lao-tzu describes.

- Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life by Dr. Wayne Dyer

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What Do You Think Of These Identified Leadership Characteristics?

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